day one

yesterday at church we agreed to a 40 day challenge of doing a prayer journal. so here goes...

ok god first off thanks a ton for all of the good things you have given us. i am continually thankful for things like food, shelter, clean water and friends and family. i know that these are special gifts and i also know that you give us things to share....so i constantly want to be sharing the good things you give me.
i have health, help me not waste it by being lazy.
i have a house, make me open it to those who need one.
i have food, let me never stop sharing food even when i don't want to turn around 'cause i have to pee when colton sees someone with a sign on the road needing food.
i have amazing friends, push me to be open to making new friends rather than keeping to myself and thinking "i have enough friends already".
i have enough money, help me to be generous rather than afraid of where the money will come from next month.
i have a great job, make me work hard every day and earn this job that is such an incredible blessing!

along the line of praising you like we learned in the prayer passage we read...
i am constantly impressed by how organized you are. thank you for taking care of the whole world and proving that you care for the sick and persecuted across the world from me, as well as granting me good weather for a day when i have to be outside with colton. i don't like to bug you for little trivial things but it is fun to see you answer and i like to imagine you smiling as you tap your finger to grant me a sweet strawberry on a sad day before you move on to all the big things you are doing. again and again i think "i am not worthy of this favor".

i had thought this winter that if we didn't wind up with frank and ezekiel after all the glimpses that seemed like it might actually happen i'd be really pissed with you. but i am super sorry for feeling that way. i think that even those glimpses were special gifts from you, reminding me that you are taking care of them. i keep feeling like i need to bust my ass to advocate for them, and then i realized through being contacted by alina that you are advocating for them and don't need my help. duh. so thank you for the knowledge that you are working in their lives. please protect them from being averse to attaching with a loving caregiver or friend. please put people in their lives that teach them to know you. please give them healthy self esteem. and if you see fit put in on domenisha's heart to allow us to be a part of their lives!

i ask that you do that for all of our foster kids. sometimes i am upset that i know about all this pain and hurt, but all in all i am glad because i know that you want us interceding for these kids. please move, and change the system.

give sean and i wisdom as we get closer to accepting a new placement. and help us to be ok only being able to take who we can in this small house. i am so thankful for this house you have given us but it is hard sometimes because i want to give a loving home to all of the kids i am presented with. help me to be satisfied knowing that you have those kid's futures in your hand and remind me that you love them more than i ever could.

help me to be a good teacher for colton. thank you for the opportunity to home school him. make me be disciplined and engaging as a teacher.

please bless eric and jana - thank you for their example, their love, their generosity. help them always be wise as they parent sweet ryan and luke. grant them patience during the trying times.

i ask that you give luke great friends and thank you for the man he is becoming.

please grant joel and amanda the desires of their hearts. i would love to see them become parents, have jobs they love and never have to make a student loan payment again!

i ask that you put the right people in mikes path so that he can find a great job that doesn't hurt his soul before his contract is up in september.

please give lan a job that he can feel at home at until he finishes school and can do his job without fear of how long that particular job will last and give him and jessie peace about their finances. thank you for always giving them enough.

i pray that you would give amy wisdom and boldness and no fear as she pursues her next steps after the dr. and i would love to see her meet a man that loves you and wants to grow closer to you in a relationship with amy.

i pray for emma, that she would be strengthened by a sense of community while she is with us, so that as she goes and works with a different crew, different time zone and different passengers she knows she has a place to call "home" whenever she is here.

i pray for sayuri to feel a sense of purpose in hawaii since she can't get transferred back to ca.

please forgive me for laziness, selfishness, and being judgmental. make me see my day the way you would, make me treat the people around me the way you would and make me see things the way you do...

amen...